Dec 14, 2020 | Meet A Mom
We can’t believe we’ve reached our last Meet-A-Mom feature of the year! Meet local NC Mom Lori Epting, licensed clinical mental health counselor and author of a new book “Chaos to Connection, A Marriage Counselor’s Candid Guide for the Modern Couple.” Her book is available now on Amazon! Check out our interview with Lori.
Where are you from originally and how long have you lived in town?
My hometown is Greensboro, NC. After living in Chapel Hill and Raleigh, I moved to Arizona for graduate school. I met my husband and had my first daughter in Arizona. We moved back to NC about 6 years ago and I have been so excited to be back in the South.
Children and Ages?
I have two daughters, Brooklyn (age 8) and Reagan (age 5).
One thing people would be surprised to know about you…
Most people don’t know that I love an adventure. Being a mom has made me a lot less adventurous (while actually it’s just a different kind of an adventure). But in my pre-kids days, I have bungee jumped the 2nd tallest bungee in the world in New Zealand, I sky-dived over the Swiss Alps, I’ve backpacked all over Europe and I’ve snow skied in 5 different countries. I’ve calmed down a lot since I became a mom- no more bungee jumping for this girl.
Anyone special you’d like to thank for helping you through parenthood?
It takes a village to get through parenting. My mom and my husband are my co-parent extraordinaires —I couldn’t imagine raising my children without their support. Starbucks is a close second!
Favorite things to do with your kids?
My favorite time is Saturday mornings—when there is no soccer or gymnastics. I crave slow, lazy mornings with my family to relax, play, and stay in our PJs all morning.
Are you involved in a business venture, a local organization, a creative endeavor, or in the corporate world?
Besides being a wife and mom of two young kids, I am a licensed clinical mental health counselor, owner of my own practice, where I specialize in marriage counseling and author of a new book, “Chaos to Connection, A Marriage Counselor’s Candid Guide for the Modern Couple.” The author of “The 5 Love Languages” says, “Reading this book is like sitting down with a seasoned counselor.”
The backstory to this book started on my 10th wedding anniversary, when my husband and I visited our wedding venue. After spending the day walking the grounds of the beautiful NC winery where we got married, I reflected on our years together. I remember the moment when I turned to him and said, “I think I’m going to write a book.”
Through the last several years, I have seen an increase in couples coming to therapy with the same struggles, many of them parents, with school-aged or younger children. They fight about the same things, over and over. I hear the same words shared from stay-at-home moms about how “he doesn’t understand how hard this can be.” Weary parents sit before me day after day, lamenting how they are drifting farther and farther apart, due to the busyness of their jobs and all the kids’ activities, and how they don’t have time for each other.
I remember thinking this is really unfair! Yes, I know how to navigate these struggles, but only because I spend more time in a month learning what makes relationships work than most people do in a lifetime.
I felt angry for my clients. It shouldn’t require a decade of training in counseling to have a close and connected marriage.
So I started writing. I wrote what I knew. My goal was to write in a way that was easy for the weary, exhausted couple to read. You hear about my marriage. You hear about my experiences helping couples through the same struggles time and time again. I wanted to show you that you’re not alone.
This guide is backed by clinically sound strategies, but delivered in a lighthearted and candid manner (with a touch of humor!) so that the you and your spouse — modern couple — can relate to it and take action.
I also help couples navigate the chaos of modern marriage at my professional blog, Marriage Sense: Making Sense of the Modern Marriage.”
What does this community mean to you/How has this community been instrumental in getting you to where you are now?
My writing career started at a neighborhood playdate. In the middle of handing out snacks and refereeing small children, my neighbor and I talked about our “dreams.” I shared that I was working on a marriage blog and had started a marriage book— but I was struggling with finding time to complete it. She shared that now that her 3rd child was close to potty-training, she was considering getting back into freelance editing. It was a match made. From that day forward, we worked closely together. Writing and editing about our shared interest in helping people improve their marriages and better their families. We would meet up and “work” while our small kids played together. As I am launching my book this month, I often think back to that playdate and how much transpired from that day. My mom friends have have been amazing in supporting my book and spreading the word to mom groups near and far. I am forever grateful.
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